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Dear Aunty: love and its anxieties — Ultimate Love

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21 February 2020
“How do I know if my partner really loves me?” You’ve asked and I’m here to answer.
<p>Dear Aunty</p>

Don’t worry, we’ve all been there. Mixed feelings, unreciprocated attention, everything wrong can go on with love and matters of the heart which makes you feel less loved or appreciated. Now imagine how that makes you feel as a human. 😖

 I’m here to get to the heart of your relationship and love problems. Don’t worry, I’m not here to judge you, I’’ just be as truthful and direct as I can be. P.S Situationship problems are welcome too 😜

*Deep breath* Let’s go straight into it, shall we? 

Q: Is it okay to tell a guy I like him before he does?

A:

My dear, it’s a free world! I personally don’t see anything wrong with telling a guy you like him. It’s your truth and your feelings but let me put it out there – be prepared for his answers, whatever it may be. He might say yes, or a blunt no. At least, na feelings you express, you no kill person. Abi? Then again darling, he might say yes!

Q: I have dated my boyfriend for 6 years but he says he doesn’t know if he will marry me, should I quit?

A:

Sweetheart, six years is an awfully long time to date someone. Listen, if he’s ready, he is ready and the truth is he doesn’t need six years to show that. So if you’re dating a guy for six years and he hasn’t made you his wife yet, then just move him to the casual friend zone.

Q: People say it’s easy to love but hard to keep the relationship. What does it take for two people to keep their relationship?

A:

For two people to keep a relationship going, a strong tool needed is equal commitment from both parties. Don’t get me wrong, I don’t expect both of them to be doing the same things. However, you should know what your partner likes that you do for them. In other words, being committed to doing those things that matter to both of you is all it takes.

Tip: This also activates your partner’s mumu button. Thank me later!

Q: How does one cope with a partner who does not understand his/her partner’s love language?

A:

A partner that doesn’t understand your love language, is that a true partner? You should spend time letting him or her know your love language. What is it that ticks your boxes? For a foodie like me, that answer is simple. Popcorn! Lol. So whatever your love language is, let your partner know so it doesn’t end in tears few months down the relationship lane.

Whew! That’s it guys. I had so much fun answering your questions and I hope you feel better reading this. Before I leave, remember this, no relationship has a cook book or manual, so all it takes to make the partnership work is understanding and tons of communication. Good luck and see you next week!

With 💓, Aunty.