Life doesn’t always work out the way we’d like it to and more often than not, things change. Change can be harder to navigate when there is a child involved.
This week, the ladies of #ZMTuvwange (Thursdays at 21:30hrs on #ZambeziMagic DStv CH 162) tackled the topic of co-parenting. They discussed how this arrangement is getting more and more common, and also went as far as sharing their personal experiences.
Mutale opened up about how she co-parents successfully with her ex-husband and his current wife. Natasha, on the other hand, revealed she is also co-parenting and has been for a long time and says it’s turned out great.
From this we realised how important communication is to make sure this arrangement works in a manner that’s beneficial to the child. What else makes the arrangement easier, and what are some of the things that make it difficult?
Here are some of the do’s and don’ts we've put together.
Let’s start with the don’ts:
1. Don’t make promises that you won’t keep because the other parent has to deal with a disappointed child.
2. Don’t bad-mouth the other parent. Your child probably doesn’t see all the faults that you see and they certainly won’t process them in a similar manner.
3. Don’t speak badly about your ex partner’s current partner. You don’t want the child developing a bad attitude towards them, because what you are trying to cultivate is a harmonious relationship amongst everyone.
4. Don’t desire to be seen as the “cool” parent at the expense of the other parent (agreeing to things the other parent has said no to).
5. Don’t put your children in a place where they feel they have to choose between the two of you. Your fights are your own.
Here are some things one can do:
1. Communicate effectively with the other parent so that you are always on the same page.
2. Make sure you’re aware of all the adults that will be around your child when you are not present and always talk about new people.
3. If possible try and do things together; outings, school functions and special days like birthdays.
4. Be honest. This makes life easier for everyone involved.
5. Make decisions that affect the child’s well-being together (medical, education, diet)
There you have it! Are you in a co-parent situation? Let us know what some of your do’s and don’ts are.
Watch #ZMTuvwange every Thursday at 21:30hrs on #ZambeziMagic DStv CH 162.