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Grown Woman

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The Hlatshwayos are breathing through the wound – Grown Woman

17 April 2023
The effects of losing Sibu have not been easy on Tina and her children and now the cracks are starting to show.
bereaved family looking down

The Hlatshwayos all have different ways of showing the extent of their grief since they are all very different people. Tina has been somewhat closed off to anything new. She has locked her heart away with memories of her lost love, Sibu. She has taken to sometimes drinking more than she should to numb the pain of losing her partner and husband. Whenever there was turmoil, the bottle was close, but so were the memories of Sibu, and once they came rushing in, it became impossible to continue with whatever task she would be busy with. Ra has had his work cut out to get Tina to open up, let alone date him. Ra has been a breath of fresh air for Tina, but she holds him at arm's length despite having fallen in love with him. Even though he is desperate for Tina to fully accept him into her life, he has to be patient and wait for her to be ready. This would also include her children and maybe getting to a place where she no longer cares what people think of her relationship with Ra. She has accepted that Sibu is gone, but the problem is that everyone else has not and that sort of acts as a bridge that she cannot get over.

Noxee has been unable to deal with her mother, trying to move on. She has been struggling since her father passed away, and you see that in her many forms of rebellion. Namely, she decides to drop out of school and throw parties while her mum and brother are out. All she wants is for someone to hear her and to see her for who she is behind the tough, carefree exterior that she puts up. She is very soft. We saw how hurt she was when her mum did not defend her after Sakhile accused her of being with Ra. That has hurt her more than her mum being in a relationship with Ra in the first place. You could say that she vacillates between acceptance and depression as she feels betrayed by her mum's actions towards her and is unwilling to listen to her mum despite her many pleas to be heard out.

Sakhile has felt the weight of not having his father around and has taken it upon himself to carry his family. This, however, has proven to be a heavy burden. One way he decided to deal with it was with anxiety medication that helped him cope and somewhat feel normal. What he struggled with was talking through his pain. He seemed to go between grief, anger, depression, and bargaining more than his mum and sister. Noxee has been a great help for him to see that he is not alone and does not have to carry the heavy burden of being all things to his family. He was very closed off at first to her, but eventually, with enough coaxing from Noxee, he could have the much-needed breakthrough he needed. He felt the most betrayed by his mum and went as far as moving out because he felt his mother has betrayed his father.


Whatever stage of grief they are going through, we can only hope that the Hlatshwayos find a way to come together as a family. Their love for each other is strong and keeps them together no matter what life throws at them. Don't miss #GrownWoman every Friday at 21:30 on 1Magic.

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