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How to survive your in-laws

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21 April 2016
How to survive your in-laws Image : 945
Do you remember the scene in Think Like A Man Too where all the ladies had gathered in their itty-bitty dresses, full of expectations of a sizzling night out for a bachelorette party? Then you will remember how the bride-to-be's overbearing mother-in-law put an almighty wrench in the works by pouring ice cold water all over those expectations by deciding the ladies would all have a tepid tea party instead? What's a girl to do when she wants to stay true to herself but also keep friendly relations with her in-laws? We have some tips for you.

Keep a united front
If you and your love intend on living happily ever after, then you need to start talking and acting like a unit. A unit that must be respected by all friends and family. If your in-laws are putting you down and pushing all your buttons and finding your last nerve with the intention of getting on it, your sweetheart needs to come to your defense. He or she cannot play both sides, because they'll put a bigger ridge in the divide. Decide ahead of time together what your plans for your days, your wedding, your babies' names, your future, your diet, and all those little and big things that made up doing life so that when your in-laws try to meddle, you speak the same language.

Take an interest in them

Never adopt a me-versus-them attitude. That will not endear you to them at all. You're part of the family, and family shows interest on family. If you know uBabomncane Mandla loves his meat, why not turn his heart towards you by cooking him a hearty, meaty stew and making sure he has the biggest portion the next time there's a family gathering? If you mother-in-law loves to harp on about the juicy goings-on at the lodeg where she works, put the kettle on and make her tea while you hang on to her every word as she shares all the salacious info she's gathered. People love it when others take an interest in them. Being the aloof ice queen/king is counterproductive to your mission.

Always stay gracious
Most of the time, in-laws that push your buttons do so just so you can snap and retaliate, just so they can prove to their loved one that you're the mean, hateful sorceress they know you're NOT. Always stay gracious and they'll be deprived of ammunition. When provoked, know when to politely stand your ground and when to take another swig of wine to keep you from spewing profanities.

Learn the culture

Every family has a culture that's unique to them. The Zwanes have a 30 Seconds night on the last Saturday of every month, and the Peterson ladies throw a high tea on the 1st of September every year. If you learn the culture and participate in it, it will be much easier to ingratiate yourself with the in-laws. How about you host the next 30 seconds night, and cook up a killer meal for the evening that will have everybody licking their fingers? You're in there!

Let them witness your love

No matter how hard your in-laws hearts may be, they will not be able to stay ossified if they witness their son or daughter being loved. Be seen to be showing your bae love and affection in front of their family. No, don't get entangled in steamy PDA at the family braai. Instead, offer to dish up for your love, or help them turn the meat. If it's cold, get up and get them a jacket or throw. These seemingly small displays of love that you probably do anyway will not go unnoticed by their family, and they'll know their son or daughter is truly loved.

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