Shosh and Njoro are like oil and water. Shosh has never liked him for two reasons: first, he impregnated her daughter Tina and second, she is her granddaughter’s primary caregiver since her daughter left for Dubai. Shosh, or Jezebel as Njoro calls her, believes that Njoro is the source of all her problems, so she makes demands on him and never misses an opportunity to lash out at him.
We asked the fans to share their most funny Jezebel punchlines, and here’s what they said:
Mgonjwa wangu wa matako
She made this remark while visiting Njoro in the hospital after he was shot in the buttocks by Becky's husband. Njoro was dating Becky and had no idea she was married. When the husband discovered this, he tracked him down and shot him.
N ujue sukari,unga na shopping zmeisha uretee ukirudi
Jezebel always calls Njoro and demands that he buy food, whether or not he has made money that day.
"You have an incoming call from Jezebel"
That statement alone is a death sentence
Njoro dreads receiving calls from her, especially when he is at work, but he has no choice because she is caring for his daughter.
Nenda usome usikue mwizi kama baba yako
Njoro was fired from the bank for bank fraud and Jezebel has never stopped rubbing it in even though he was exonerated. When Stacy refused to go to school one morning, she told her the above notwithstanding the fact that Njoro was in the same room with her.
The time jezebel was hospitalized she said to the doctor to take care of nurses wasipewe mimba na njoro
Jezebel has always been angry with Njoro for impregnating her one and only daughter and child. Her anger grew even more after he impregnated another woman. As a result, whenever she sees Njoro with a woman, she warns her not to fall pregnant by Njoro.
Njoro: "Nilikuwa hapa around nikaonelea niingie nikusalimie."
Jezebel: "Kwani ni kukufa unakufa?"
Even when Njoro is sincere, Jezebel believes otherwise. When he genuinely called to find out how she was doing, Jezebel found it awkward and asked if he was dying.
Bwana ya mabibi za wenyewe is her latest line
Jezebel gave Njoro this name after he was recently shot for having an affair with a married woman.
Kwani hawa polisi hawafiki,wanatoka kiganjo miguu..
This occurred while her former partner, Waithaka, was in town. They were both staying at Njoro's house and were constantly arguing. So, when Njoro said he was calling the cops, Jezebel sarcastically enquired if they were walking from Kiganjo, the police training academy.
Nancy O Mokeira
Birthday ya mtoto gani Ju uko nao wengi?
Njoro is referred to as “Father Abraham” by Jezebel, because he not only impregnated Tina but also Cess. When he said he wanted to plan a birthday party for one of his children, Jezebel asked which child this was, because he has many.
Njoroje unaingia bila kubisha hata choo ya kanjo hubishwa
When Njoro failed to knock on Jezebel's door before entering, she yelled at him, saying that people knock before entering public restrooms, so how much more when entering her home?
Catch more rib-cracking punchlines on Njoro Wa Uba every Friday at 7 pm on DStv 163 and GOtv Supa CH 8.