Love Wedding Bashers as much as we do? If the answer is "Yes", then we know for a fact that Bernelee, Denise, Zavion and Zola aka 'The Awesome Foursome' have a place in your heart too. Take this fun quiz to find out if you and your favourite Bash(er) are actually twinsies.
What’s your pet peeve?
a). People with bad shoes. Why even bother wearing shoes, doll-face?
b). Bar’s “last call”. Which wise-guy dreamt that up?
c). Friends who don’t follow your seating chart at your holiday dinner
d). People who have fish dishes with red wine. How dare you?
Your favourite #Hashtag to trawl on IG when you have a little free time?
What’s your favourite phrase to use and stuff?
a). Life’s too short to wear boring clothes
b). If you don’t drink, how will your friends know you love them at 2AM?
c). “I think we need fewer cushions”, said no interior designer ever!
d). Let them eat cake!
What would make you ditch a date quick?
a). If they look sloppy. Wrinkled clothes for what, love?
b). A date that orders a revolting mix of regret - and calls it their “fave cocktail”.
c). Someone who picks a badly decorated restaurant with bad lighting. Were you raised by wildebeests?
d). A date that spends all night debunking “myths” about the parson’s nose. You love your chicken (and butts), but not enough to talk about chicken and butts *that* much, thanks.
Your favourite thing to be judge-y about at a wedding?
a). The wedding gown
b). The bar tab closing too early
c). The decor
d). The food
Sometimes, even your parents look at you and think “Wow. How the hell did we create such an immaculate being?”. Apart from being gorgeous, you’ve got style for days, so it’s no wonder when someone in the family is about to get hitched, you’re their first point of call. No one is trying to go shopping for a wedding dress without you, because why would they want to look like something the neighbourhood stray dragged in, ate and spit back up? You’ll scan a bridal boutique with your trained fashion eye and immediately swoop in on the perfect gown. Because of this very talent, the groom wants you to dress him and his groomsmen now.
You’re the life of the party, without a doubt. Everyone can count on having the best time at the wedding when you are around. You drink Aunt Susan and uncle George under the table (and everyone still can’t get over it because Aunt Sue is the welterweight drinking champ). “Gramps” knows to get extra hip reinforcements before the wedding, because guess who’ll be burning up the dance-floor with his Top 10 moves from the ‘Roaring 20s’? Your little cousins love you because you’ll pass them a glass of grape juice* at the reception. The bride and groom? They are forever indebted to you because you’ll ensure that there are no problems at the bar. Tab’s run out? Let’s drink a quarter of those tuition savings, why don’t we? All together now…. “Drinks on ME!”
Your taste is unrivalled, thanks. You’re the cousin that knows what an epithalamium is (Wow). The bride and groom often feel sorry for themselves plus/minus two days before the actual wedding, because YOU could have actually been their wedding planner and not the lady that lives on coffee, cigarettes and the souls (and tears) of anxious brides. You’re called upon to lead the “strenuous, long-winded activity that is the venue hunt”, but there you are locking down the venue of dreams in just under an hour. (Wow). Strenuous for who? When Miss cigarettes-coffee-and-tears switches off her phone a day before the wedding and goes AWOL, you glide in and save the day as if with a click of your perfectly manicured fingers. Hello elaborate flower chandeliers and towers, sparkly diamonds and generally the most incredible décor anyone’s ever laid eyes on. You décor god/dess, you!
Everyone love, love, loves visiting your house because of all the delicious delights waiting in your kitchen, begging to be scoffed down. Your glossary of food terms leaves everyone delirious with hunger - and for some strange (but necessary) reason, everyone gets the urge to engage in a little bit of shigging, in your kitchen. “Glazed, sautéed, beautiful” lets everyone know you’re the foodie they should call on when it’s time to plan a wedding menu. When the wedding comes, you’re overseeing every single detail, from the actual technique being used to remove the parson’s nose, to the actual prep and plating of the food. Your chefs hat being thrown into the mix is the reason why everyone will be talking about “the food we had at the wedding” for years to come.
Notes: *Not really grape juice
Watch the final episode of Wedding Bash(ers): With Love on M-Net Channel 101, this Sunday at 18:00. Follow all things show-related on Twitter @MNet / #WeddingBashers or on the official M-Net Facebook page.